Change Your Life

One of my favorite professors in college-- hell, let’s not kid ourselves, my absolute favorite-- was this guy I had for a photography class. Understand, I am not a photographer, I have no desire to become a photographer, and while I enjoy using photographic elements in my art, it’s not something I’ve ever been serious about. But this guy, to listen to him... god, it made you think twice. He made you want to get out there and shoot. He was just one of those teachers, passionate in a way that made other people passionate too.

He used to wheel around the room in this massive office chair, going from desk to desk while people were playing around with Photoshop or sifting through prints and negatives. He had a great, booming voice, and if you weren’t paying attention to where he was at any given moment, he could suddenly appear over your shoulder and scare the shit out of you. For some reason, had a tendency to make these strange “Hmm” noises, which almost became whole sentences at times. His vowels were always drawn out; he sounded like Edward G. Robinson speaking into a megaphone. “WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON?” he’d ask, stroking his goatee. “WHERE ARE YOU GOING WITH THIS? WHAT ARE YOU HOPING TO ACHIEVE WITH THAT SHOT?” Then, before you ever had a chance to answer, he’d launch into a rant of some kind, a little five-minute improvised lecture. It could be nerve-racking and frustrating, but I learned more and thought more about myself as an artist than I did in any other class I ever took.

One day, he was talking to a friend of mine, a very talented photographer, about her work. He demanded (he never asked, but demanded) to know what her next steps were, what he goal for this body of work was, if she planned on showing someplace. She said yes, and I’m sure had more to add after that, but never got to it because he immediately interrupted. “GREAT! SO WHEN WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE THIS SHOW? WHAT SORT OF VENUE ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT? A GALLERY, A RESTAURANT, A CAFÉ, WHAT? I KNOW, WE COULD SHOW SOME OF OUR WORK TOGETHER, YOU AND ME! I KNOW A COUPLE OF PLACES DOWNTOWN THAT WOULD BE PERFECT! WHADAYA SAY? LET’S GO SIGN UP!”

“Well,” my friend said, “I can’t sign up now. I don’t have enough decent work to show. I need to wait until I’ve got enough stuff.”

“AND WHEN IS THAT GOING TO BE, CLASS?” he said, turning to the rest of us and raising his voice even louder. “FUCKING NEVER.”

Now, if you didn’t know the guy, or didn’t have any experience with art, or artists, that could come off as really rude and uncalled for. But as it happens, I do know the guy, and I do have some experience with both art and artists, and personally I think that’s about the best piece of advice I’ve ever heard. It was a whole little parable, so perfect I’m still not convinced he didn’t plan the whole thing.

His point, as he went on to explain, was that you don’t wait until the work is done and then go arrange a show. You arrange the show and then you by god get the work done in time to show it. You can’t wait until everything is just right, because it’s never going to be. You’ll always find something you don’t like, something you’d like to replace, one more detail that you’d like to fix. Without a deadline, you’ll tinker around forever without being satisfied. General George S. Patton put it another way:

“A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.”

That applies to almost everyone, in almost every situation. I have people that I talk to who say “I’m not happy with my life. I want to change things. But I have to wait for this and this and that,” and next thing you know, a month or six months or a year has gone by, and they haven’t changed anything. They keep waiting for all the dominoes to get lined up just so before they’ll make a move, and if you do that, you’ll never stop waiting. The dominoes are never going to line up. Circumstances are never going to be perfect. Sure, it’s good to prepare, and sometimes you have to wait for a certain moment, but in the end, any change, any challenge, is going to require a leap of faith. “I’ll take this jump,” you say to yourself, “and we’ll see where we land.”

I think most people, looking at my life, would say that I’ve been pretty lucky, in that every time I’ve taken the leap, I’ve landed on pretty solid ground. But in truth, I haven’t. There have been just as many missteps, just as many times when I landed in quicksand, or worse. So you dig yourself out. It’s not impossible. It’s not pleasant, but who ever said we get pleasant all the time? Whatever you do, for better or worse, as long as you’re still alive when it’s over, you’ll be okay. As long as you’re alive, there’s a way out, a solution to the problem. I believe that.

So what are you waiting for? What are any of us ever waiting for? Do you really think someone’s just going to show up and hand you the life you want on a platter? This isn’t a story; there’s no deus ex machina coming to save you. It’s all on you. Go.

Time’s a wastin’.